Quarter-Life Crisis

I found out I am suffering from more than 10 characteristics of quarter-life crisis out of 18. Without any research done on it, I conclude those who are facing it now perhaps are also seeking for peacefulness, craving for getting out from all uninvited thoughts of future, flying far away with all mighty freedom.

Youth Olympic Games

Perhaps one thing I will regret the most in the very end of the year is, I didn't go all the way for Youth Olympic Games. It's not easy to have the chance that thing just came to you and you don't need to purposely go there. I'm not sure in the future I'll make it to watch an Olympic game. But anyway, it's okay. If it's really the most regrettable thing in a year already, it means this year is not that bad ^_^. I hope!

My Best Friend

In one random day, we just finished our lunch and were standing in front of the lift. At that time, my colleague suddenly remembered something. She then showed me her facebook wall on her cellphone. "Read this!" She smiled happily as if it were a very wonderful thing. It's her friend wrote that she missed her because she saw a little girl on the street that resembles my this colleague."Very cute, eh? This friend is my very very bes tfriend. Do you have a best friend?"

I don't think I have. Though, I answered her "I have a lot of good friends."

"That one is good friends. Not best friends."

"How do you define?"

"Well, you will just know when you have."

I'm convinced. No. Actually I already know that.

I have a quick thought I didn't have and would be happy if she said "Yah. That good friends are your best friends." I would be very happy if she actually treated good friends and misunderstand good friends as best friends.

But really deep inside my heart, I know I don't have one. I was just still too proud to admit. If I couldn't yet experience "He's the one" concept upon confirming our life partner and I am doubtful I would have the chance and/or perhaps I've agreed something like that won't happen to everybody, but on this idea on realizing our best friend, out of question I agree. We'll just know when he/she is our best friend. As simple as that. It's the sense.

So in one night, I texted my another friend and asked her the same question thrown to me to figure out whether I'm the only person in the world at this age that does not have what-so-called-a-bestfriend.

She answered me, "Did you just send me a wrong message?"

Which is no. Later on, she replied me, "No, I don't have neither. But it's okay, isn't it?"

There are 101 reasons I can mention out why I think I think normally a person should have at least a best friend, of course based on my standard, but lesser reasons why I don't even have one.

She texted me one more time, "Actually your boyfriend is your best friend." Continued on, "That's why people say when you break up, you are not only losing your lover, instead, the heaviest part is, you are losing your best friend as well."

I had exactly the same point of view, but it's in the past. I used to think my boyfriend should be also my best friend. It'd been a common behavior I guess. Two persons are courting with the history, they were best friends to each other. That was time I hadn't seen the meeting and the parting. When the parting takes place, in order to let life moves on, boyfriend is no longer a best friend. He can be still a good one, but he shouldn't be a close one. With this limitation, somehow my definition of the best friend itself has been ruined.

My best friend will know when I'm needing him/her. My best friend will be there for me at the highest and lowest point of my life. My best friend will stand by me no matter what. I don't really treat a best friend as a best friend if the relationship is actually based on love between a man and a woman. A best friend will also love you, but it's a different kind of love, surpassing a lot of other things. You can always argue with him/her, mess up the things together, quarreling over years for goodness, but each knows they will get back together, with stronger love, love between friends.

If he/she, my best friend, would ever exist, I'm wanting so much to know how he/she looks like. If the chance ever comes... But for the time being, the closest figure I can get is only myself and no any other choices but I have to live with it.

Hmmmmmmm

I have three draft entries. A few times I've tried to finish at least one. After switching one and another, I realize I'm losing my ability to write. It's not easy anymore to get something I enjoy doing for long-term. So I really hope this only happens temporary.

Some Updates of the Third Week of August 2010

I'm not sure what is the thing that makes me happy the most on this Friday (it's not the combo Friday + pay day!): the fact that it's Friday after previous tiring days? Irritating bug in my program eventually fixed all of sudden? Room viewing is over and I don't need to bother to tidy up my room everyday or get busy replying message from prospective tenants? Finally finish the essay and complete my application? Lots of movies wait for me on weekends? Whatever. I'm feeling very light now :D and that's the only thing that counts and reasons are not essential, right?! I'm too lazy to even edit the way I type all of these in more proper manner. Three weeks dealing with essay is more than enough.

I met at least six people viewing my current room, got called by at least seventeen people either asking about the room, trying to make an appointment. It's ten days ago I started to make an advertisement and after a lot of texts and calls and meet-ups back and forth, the one who takes up the room is the first person who comes to view. Sometimes I'd rather call it 'fate'. Two of them confirmed want to take if I can move out earlier. Another case, this first person and another person confirmed on the same day but the landlord picked the first. After this, it's not called 'luck'?

Anyway, there is a person that came to view and she quite impressed me. She's a scientist. But it's not really because of her job I'm impressed, but she showed totally the opposite from what I expect from a scientist. She took few seconds and seemed so hard to answer my simple questions : 'If your current place is near to the workplace, why do you intend to stay here?', 'Do research on what?', 'How do you come here? Bus or MRT?' Only two reasons from this behavior I can conclude, 90% of her mind is still busy occupied by her so-called-research or she really can think of few further steps before me to anticipate my future question from her answer. Ah, cannot find other logical reasons.

News from workplace. Within 3 months, there are 5 people leaving, which is almost 12% of population. It's awful. Three of them are from same department. This fact can actually show the leadership of the manager. Another one is receptionist and I'm hearing some gossip flying over that the company is not hiring for new one. Can you imagine a company without a receptionist? Three people are appointed to cover receptionist's duties (of course not me lah). Back to the lacking resource department. I cannot understand the basis of why company do not move to find the substitutes for them. I know it's not yet peak season till February to March, but time. They all need to be trained up and it doesn't take short time, rather than losing 40% number of customer calls unanswered. It'll be a great loss later. Tell me, isn't it a basic thing to do?

I just finished up watching Kamikaze Girls. It's quite similar with the story in the book. But I still think the movie is better, funnier and more lively. Pardon me for being random tonight. I'm watching The Apprentice currently and I don't really like Donald Trump's attitude. Especially his hair. Yet, I enjoy the show. And with this eyes going to close very soon, I bid you a good night!