What I found out recently : I couldn't keep my mind not to fly to somewhere else.
So on last Friday on Vesak Day, I went to a temple to listen to a Dharma talk. At the end of the talk, we're asked to meditate for a few minutes.
During the school life, I'd known I've a serious problem in focusing on verbal communication. Whatever the lecturer explained about something, I could immediately decide on keeping 'this time I really need to listen' firm promise, but found myself being in somewhere else much more immediate that you could ever imagine. That's why my self learning and studying always involved a lot of visualization instead. For me, the most effective way to get an A grade is by repeating readings and repeating practices to those science subjects. Why did I have to repeat? Because my ability to memorize is just as bad as my concentration on words flying in the air. So on and so forth, I never tried to memorize sentences in the book but invent on ways to translate the same meanings in those sentences into words, not because I liked to create my own trouble, but what seems much easier to some people is way so difficult for me.
During working life, there are no more long hours of a pair of sitting-listening required on daily basis. But the five days in a week, almost 10 hours spent in the office, are like a cycle that never ends. Time is a luxury. And that's when the problem starts to arise : when you think time is so much precious, and because of that, you want to do a lot of things at one time, you want to have the full use of yourself on the light day. What's that for after all?
I went home and threw myself into the bed. I closed and rested my eyes. In a second, my mind began to make some noises. "Open the tv, perhaps some good shows is in the air.", "Turn on the laptop. Play!", "Or eat dinner first?", "What time is it? Soon your day is over and tomorrow is another working day. Utilize it!" The busy world seems so promising. I've forgotten about the art of doing nothing, the significance of resting in peacefulness, and the must to make it as a priority each day. If time is that precious, resting my mind should be on the top of the list to spend.
I'd gone to several places in thousand miles away during my meditation, searched for a way back, returned to another place, and it's been a loop before it's forced to come back when the meditation is over. The journey is short but enough to make me mad at myself, "CAN YOU LISTEN TO ME AND JUST STAY AT YOUR PLACE, please??" I soon torn down my priority list. Re-build. And ready for a big revolution!
So on last Friday on Vesak Day, I went to a temple to listen to a Dharma talk. At the end of the talk, we're asked to meditate for a few minutes.
During the school life, I'd known I've a serious problem in focusing on verbal communication. Whatever the lecturer explained about something, I could immediately decide on keeping 'this time I really need to listen' firm promise, but found myself being in somewhere else much more immediate that you could ever imagine. That's why my self learning and studying always involved a lot of visualization instead. For me, the most effective way to get an A grade is by repeating readings and repeating practices to those science subjects. Why did I have to repeat? Because my ability to memorize is just as bad as my concentration on words flying in the air. So on and so forth, I never tried to memorize sentences in the book but invent on ways to translate the same meanings in those sentences into words, not because I liked to create my own trouble, but what seems much easier to some people is way so difficult for me.
During working life, there are no more long hours of a pair of sitting-listening required on daily basis. But the five days in a week, almost 10 hours spent in the office, are like a cycle that never ends. Time is a luxury. And that's when the problem starts to arise : when you think time is so much precious, and because of that, you want to do a lot of things at one time, you want to have the full use of yourself on the light day. What's that for after all?
I went home and threw myself into the bed. I closed and rested my eyes. In a second, my mind began to make some noises. "Open the tv, perhaps some good shows is in the air.", "Turn on the laptop. Play!", "Or eat dinner first?", "What time is it? Soon your day is over and tomorrow is another working day. Utilize it!" The busy world seems so promising. I've forgotten about the art of doing nothing, the significance of resting in peacefulness, and the must to make it as a priority each day. If time is that precious, resting my mind should be on the top of the list to spend.
I'd gone to several places in thousand miles away during my meditation, searched for a way back, returned to another place, and it's been a loop before it's forced to come back when the meditation is over. The journey is short but enough to make me mad at myself, "CAN YOU LISTEN TO ME AND JUST STAY AT YOUR PLACE, please??" I soon torn down my priority list. Re-build. And ready for a big revolution!
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